Sometimes, I Hate Myself by msdbzloverful, literature
Literature
Sometimes, I Hate Myself
Sometimes, I hate myself.
Sometimes I feel this incredible amount of self loathing and hatred and I can’t exactly explain why. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I look at my face and I hate the person behind it and I hate who I am and how I’ve been treated. I hate how many times people have made fun of me. Or someone comes up and says: “Oh my friend likes you.” And their friend screams. “Ew gross!”
I hate how I’m probably never going to be with someone. I hate how people don’t like me. I hate how I’m looked at as hideous to others when I feel like I’m a good person. I hate how har
The anxiety is building up again, nightmares progress. I’m not depressed, really, I’m just full of thoughts and ideas that run through my mind at lightning speed in clouds, each thought a little water drop in the huge gray cloud. My thoughts are a storm. Depression would be extreme sadness over a period of time, I’m not sad, I’m just off, I’m different now. I don’t feel happy, I really don’t, but I just don’t feel sad. I feel like if a midlife crisis is harder than this then I won’t live to see forty…
I do feel trapped. Like white walls closing in, white walls cornering me, screamin
Jibran was poking his lover’s shoulder repeatedly. “Adam, Adam, Adam, Adam.”
Adam was sitting on his bed with his notebook, a pen, and some tea. His music played in the background, progressively getting quieter since Jibran was raising his voice.
“What?!” Adam finally snaps, immediately regretting it and looking at Jibran, sighing. “What?” He asks softer and kinder this time.
Jibran frowns at first but then smiles when Adam asks more politely. He nuzzles into Adam’s chest, ignoring the hot tea’s cup burning the side of his leg. “You hungry?”
Adam chuckles a little and ru
I live on a doomed Earth,
Its wrong to be me,
I have been dying since birth,
You're stared at if you can't walk, think, speak, or see,
Money is better than service in worth,
And no one is completely free.
Clouds of cogs
Educational days are long,
Stacks of logs,
Your beliefs are wrong,
Skies of smog,
You're not allowed to sing your song.
Are you a reject like me?
Normal or crazy,
Is death the only way to be free?
Working or lazy,
Are your reasons to live across countries or seas?
Clear or hazy.
Yes, I know I'm a fag,
Sure, I'm emo, goth, or scene,
Your name calling is a hate tag,
You have been taught to be mean,
Dispose of me immediately
Sit with me under the moon light,
And make my heart pound for you,
Cuddle me in the grass tonight,
And make me forget the world, too.
It’s been long since the red liquid iron dipped down my arms,
And everyday I take some pills,
And he came and swept me with his charms,
A hole in my heart he fills.
It’s all a lie in reality,
I feel my heart crumble over time,
And he changes my view and mentality,
Now life is bitter like a lemon instead of a lime.
I don’t trust men at all,
In fact, I may hate them, now.
My chest rises and falls,
And my heart beats, pow, pow.
I don’t need a boy, it’s true,
I survived a war on my
Sometimes, I Hate Myself by msdbzloverful, literature
Literature
Sometimes, I Hate Myself
Sometimes, I hate myself.
Sometimes I feel this incredible amount of self loathing and hatred and I can’t exactly explain why. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I look at my face and I hate the person behind it and I hate who I am and how I’ve been treated. I hate how many times people have made fun of me. Or someone comes up and says: “Oh my friend likes you.” And their friend screams. “Ew gross!”
I hate how I’m probably never going to be with someone. I hate how people don’t like me. I hate how I’m looked at as hideous to others when I feel like I’m a good person. I hate how har
The anxiety is building up again, nightmares progress. I’m not depressed, really, I’m just full of thoughts and ideas that run through my mind at lightning speed in clouds, each thought a little water drop in the huge gray cloud. My thoughts are a storm. Depression would be extreme sadness over a period of time, I’m not sad, I’m just off, I’m different now. I don’t feel happy, I really don’t, but I just don’t feel sad. I feel like if a midlife crisis is harder than this then I won’t live to see forty…
I do feel trapped. Like white walls closing in, white walls cornering me, screamin
Jibran was poking his lover’s shoulder repeatedly. “Adam, Adam, Adam, Adam.”
Adam was sitting on his bed with his notebook, a pen, and some tea. His music played in the background, progressively getting quieter since Jibran was raising his voice.
“What?!” Adam finally snaps, immediately regretting it and looking at Jibran, sighing. “What?” He asks softer and kinder this time.
Jibran frowns at first but then smiles when Adam asks more politely. He nuzzles into Adam’s chest, ignoring the hot tea’s cup burning the side of his leg. “You hungry?”
Adam chuckles a little and ru
I live on a doomed Earth,
Its wrong to be me,
I have been dying since birth,
You're stared at if you can't walk, think, speak, or see,
Money is better than service in worth,
And no one is completely free.
Clouds of cogs
Educational days are long,
Stacks of logs,
Your beliefs are wrong,
Skies of smog,
You're not allowed to sing your song.
Are you a reject like me?
Normal or crazy,
Is death the only way to be free?
Working or lazy,
Are your reasons to live across countries or seas?
Clear or hazy.
Yes, I know I'm a fag,
Sure, I'm emo, goth, or scene,
Your name calling is a hate tag,
You have been taught to be mean,
Dispose of me immediately
Black Butler, If you count videos, I watch Cry, Pewdiepie, Smosh, etc.
Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
My Chemical Romance, LeATHERMOUTH, Paramore, Three Days Grace, Black Veil Brides, Linkin Park, Fall Out Boy, Amy Lee, Falling In Reverse, Green Day, Panic! At The Disco, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Pierce The Veil, Blink 182, All American Rejects,
Favourite Books
The Chronicles Of Vladimir Tod, Johnny The Homicidal Maniac, Umbrella Academy,
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